The above question came through one of my friends a few weeks ago as I shared about my own Save My Cents journey, and it made me grin. My answer is that it all comes down to expectations. And I want you to know just how much meaning I do find in my life.
Think of your life as one pot of coins of happiness
Imagine for each year of your life you have one coin of happiness. Happiness does come with wealth, activities, and friends, and is driven by external factors.
Joy is driven internally, and lasts through famine, injustice, and pain.
People who overspend beyond their means when young, are borrowing against their future pool of happiness. They might be spending 2 coins of happiness when young, and when older, they have 0 coins of happiness. Just look at how anywhere between 20 – 40% of American seniors today derive all their income from social security.
The sooner you figure out how to have joy, the less you depend on happiness
I teach the principle of Finding Joy. Joy is the ability to control your emotions and choose to be peaceful, no matter what circumstance. Consider the words of Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor who wrote about his experiences and has helped change the world of psychotherapy: “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
A minimalist life is less stressful
I enjoyed becoming more minimalist. You can see my posts about my Capsule Wardrobe. And how I don’t need a lot to cook food. And how to destress over holiday gifting.
I prioritize exactly that which feeds my soul
The 3 biggest non-housing related expenses in my household are: 1) food 2) travel 3) networking. These things are important to us. We are not depriving ourselves by any means. However, there are certainly other things I enjoy (fashion, very expensive meals, very nice hotels, more home decor) that I have pared back my expectations of, because there are diminishing returns.
There is purpose to my Save My Cents journey
I have financial goals that include helping people other than myself. When my work and resources become about someone else, it makes me more motivated. I cannot emphasize how much joy and connection and activity this brings me – making my life very much not hermit-like.
I am choosing to make my circle smaller online
In ebbs and flows, I have chosen to limit who could have access to my thoughts on social media, and whose thoughts I want to hear from because that has influence over how I spend my time. I can make sure that not everyone should have access to my thoughts. This is for self-protection, not because I dislike anyone. I’ve moved beyond those teenager emotions, and realized that life is simply about caring and not caring. This would allow me to thrive in a more limited environment.
We do a lot of fun stuff for very low cost
New York City is not the cheapest place to build a life – hence many people moving away – but we have found ways to enjoy it. We make it a point to do something fun that gets us out of the house each weekend day. We have weekly date nights. We use up all of our PTO to go on holidays.
For daily inspiration and encouragement, join the Save My Cents Facebook group. To receive more information about money coaching, contact me.
